"it slices! it dices! it circumcises! the Person Name Memorial Turbo Encabulator is the kitchen tool you cannot live without! why buy just one?"
"memorial?"
"ah, yes... inventor Person Name was actually trying to invent a device for anal pleasure, but after, shall we say, an unfortunate accident, his company pivoted to market his invention as a kitchen tool. the Person Name Memorial TURRRRRRRBO Encabulator! why buy just one?"
(needs more buttsex puns.)
inspired by someone glancing at a Foreman Grill and remarking that having a kitchen gadget named after you might be the highest honor mankind can bestow. how many others have achieved it?
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