[nyvplgkt] But my boundaries are evil

A person has sexual boundaries they they don't like having violated, but they also recognize that their boundaries line up with great evils of society, e.g., racism, classism, religious intolerance, bigotry about sexual orientation.  While having one's boundaries violated is unpleasant, also unpleasant is exercising the power of complaining about the consent violation, exercising a power that perpetuates and enforces such social injustices: one has become a conduit for evil.  Discomfort with exercising such power is magnified if there are institutions which automatically trigger punishment once a consent violation has been determined to have occurred.  A person feeling uncomfortable with such institutions would rather not think about sex in terms of boundaries and consent, so perhaps therefore they do not think about sex in those terms.

This makes consent culture tricky: it tries to force people into a box of thinking along the lines of consent and boundaries when some would rather not, and do not, for legitimate reasons.

Another person, believing that their partner would prefer not to think about sex in terms of consent and boundaries, does not ask about consent and boundaries in order to be polite, to respect their values.